On purpose, we left one of Pat Bruno's reviews out of today's review roundup. It's a review of Nacional 27, which not only is a restaurant that we went to with our ex-boyfriend for our twenty-first birthday like five (billion) years ago, but is also a restaurant that Bruno had previously reviewed, all the way back in 2001.

Our hope was that Bruno would use his re-review to redress some of the shortcomings of his turn-of-the-millennium musings. Like the part where he actually denies the science behind ceviche:

The theory behind seviche is that the raw fish is marinated in citrus juice, which suggests the idea that the juice ''cooks'' the fish. I don't buy that, but that's another story [emphasis added].

So we were thinking that in today's review, he'd recant his 2001 ceviche creationism. But no &mdash the only thing he says about Nacional 27's ceviche is that the hamachi mojito and ahi tuna-watermelon were much better than the halibut and shrimp varieties.

Another interesting element from 2001 &mdash if by "interesting" we mean "sweepingly scathing":

While I find some of the dishes here quite interesting, I am also aware of more than a few shortcomings. I am baffled, for example, by what the kitchen is attempting. I see a friction that grinds uncomfortably between the concept of what should be enjoyable culinary craft and fanciful flights of inspiration, more than a few of which do not exactly pan out.

It was obvious after but one bite that I was going to polish off the skirt steak. Certainly skirt steak is not the best cut of beef around, but in its simplicity there is unflagging enjoyment. Tender, flavorful, juicy, the steak got an accompaniment of mashed boniato (a type of potato) with a tangy avocado salsa adding an extra kick of flavor. [2001]

As for the grilled marinated skirt steak, I have had better and I have had worse. This one was a little tough around the edges and lacked that deep, grilled flavor that I associate with skirt steak that I have had, say, in a steak burrito. A form of guacamole and a salsa cruda flanked the steak, and both were kind of boring. [2008]

Ah well. What remains consistent, even after all this time, is the inconsistency of the quality. The ice cream sandwich is "a joke," calamari a la plancha was "squishy-bad." Give it another seven years, Bruno, why don't you?

Dinner dance [Sun-Times, 2008]
Nacional 27 [Sun-Times, 2001]
Nacional 27 [MenuPages]
Nacional 27 [Official Site]

[Photo via Nacional 27]

You know there's a good PR team at work when a restaurant shows up on Thrillist, DailyCandy, JuliB, and UrbanDaddy. But who does it best? We subscribe, read, and levy judgment... so you don't have to

In this inaugural edition of Showdown, we have newbie Italian joint Piccolo Sogno, which opens today. The contenders: Thrillist, DailyCandy, and UrbanDaddy. JuliB is apparently sitting this first round out.

Thrillist's take on...
a cutesy title: "On the 'Lo"
the chef, Tony Priolo: "Longtime right-hand men chomp at the bit to step up and unleash their own unique creativity -- Snoop's last words to Dre were "One day I will use Peter Frampton's voice-box to record an R&B song"."
the dining room: "like a Pier 1 exploded inside Donald Trump's penthouse."
the menu: "ambitiously pan-Italian, whisking your ambitious gut from Naples (creamy buffalo mozzarella and fresh basil studded Margherita pizza) to Sicily (wood-fired whole fish w/ sea salt and braised fennel) to Rome (slow-roasted pork in garlic, olive oil, and fennel)."
the bar: "The 100+ bottle wine list also spans the Boot, with Chianti, Brunello, Barbaresco, and more from Umbria, Piedmont, Veneto, and loads of other regions you know intimately as "In Italy, right?" Priolo's also spreading his hard-liquor wings, with 12 signature cocktails."

UrbanDaddy's take on...
a cutesy title: "Molto Patio"
the ambiance: "Complete with a lush and airy back patio, Piccolo transports you oceans away from busy Halsted Street (OK, maybe blocks). The garden outdoes former occupant Timo (no slouch in the authenticity department), and the fragrance of new junipers, and soon, fresh herbs, will have you swearing you're on a mini Roman holiday."
what to order: "we say go with a cold Menabrea. The Italian brew stands up nicely to Piccolo's wood-fired pizzas and its porchetta, Roman-style roasted pork."

DailyCandy's take on...
a cutesy title: "Dream On"
the menu: "Simplicity reigns: house-made breads, organic Northern Italian risotto grains, Mediterranean fish, San Marzano tomatoes, mozzarella from Naples. The well-rounded menu includes heirloom tomato salad, crunchy pizzas, handmade spinach and ricotta gnocchi, and rosemary-marinated lamb T-bones."
The bar: "The cocktails are seasonal as well: This month try the blood orange mimosa."

Winner: Thrillist, for providing maximum information with maximum mockery of the interior design tastes of self-styled oligarchs.
Loser: DailyCandy, for providing absolutely no unique information whatsoever, and sending their email two whole days after the other two, which makes us wonder if they were even on the initial press release mailing list at all.

Thanks for playing, everyone! See you next time!

Piccolo Sogno [MenuPages]
Piccolo Sogno [Official Site]

[Photo: Showdown, via avant gardenia's Flickr]

Remember how, for a few minutes, graham elliot was BYOB? Well, as of last night, they got their liquor license and if you want to bring your own bottle, that will be $25, please, according to the man himself.

graham elliot [MenuPages]
graham elliot [Official Site]

[Photo: a sample wine list, from g.e.'s website]

French-infused food is nothing new to Chicago. Takashi slips French into Japanese fare, Avec makes a (very) happy family of French, Mediterranean and Italian flavors and Le Passage fancies their bar food as French, but who’s doing French-Mexican? No one, until Mexique.

Husband and wife duo (it’s the chic way to open if you haven’t noticed) Carlos Gaytan and Iliamar Isaac chose Tuesday to open their doors on a stretch of Chicago Avenue known for its cowboy boots and taquerias. You can even buy live chickens at Hermitage, but probably not for long. The stroller-pushing hipsters and single-scouting diners that have settled into the hood need a place where they can be seen, preferably eating upscale food. A spot like Mexique feels appropriate.

If your first thought is burritos and French fries, you’re wrong. Chef Carolos Gaytan, whose resume includes seven plus years at the Union League Club, three years at Bistrot Margot and a short stint at Adobo Grill, combines his Mexican heritage with French training for a sophisticated result. Carlos tells us (talk to him when you go, his voice coos) he loves to cook and knows that to be a chef you must also be a "creator."

So what’s he creating? Pretty good stuff. On the appetizer list, a trio of sopes are filled with escargot and chimichurri butter, shrimp and avocado mousse, and plantains slathered with a spicy chocolate mole. Tuesday’s tuna ceviche (chef’s choice daily) was surrounded with tiny translucent gelatin cubes that tasted like a tortilla chip. The vetabel sounds just as peculiar as its spelled, but the combination of port wine poached beets with horseradish vinaigrette and a fried goat cheese cake promises an entourage of flavor.

On the main menu, Gaytan purees Malanga root from the Yucatan with white truffles as a topper for the NY steak. Dorado (Spanish for mahi mahi) is served with green beans, tiger shrimp, muscles and clams in a morita-saffron bouillon. A duck breast sports a chipotle-temple tamarind glaze and comes with a cranberry tamal.

After-dinner drinks are not on the menu, which is limited to a well-priced selection of wine. Iliamar (who is behind the design of the space and now has her career as an architect on hold to run the restaurant) tells us the list is only preliminary and will include beer in the future, but that cocktails have intentionally been left off. For fear a patron might order a midori-infused margarita to drink alongside their poblano pork tenderloin, maybe? We’re not sure, but if it’s tequila and citrus you want, you can find some resemblance of it on the dessert menu: the "Margarita" is a tequila pomegranate gelee with pink grapefruit sorbet and sea salt, for example. France and Mexico take turns down the list with classic options like crème brulee and apple tart or chocolate ganache and ancho chile enchiladas.

Call now for a table. It’s our guess once word gets out they’ll be hard to come by. Lunch starts in two weeks and weekend brunch is in the works.

Mexique [MenuPages]
Mexique [Official Site]

[Photo: Carne at Mexique]

We got a review in yesterday afternoon from user ".............." for John's Pizzeria in Bucktown that made a rather audacious claim:

So I just moved to chicago and my roommate told how John's Pizzaria has great food. So I decided to try it out and called to order some food. The lady who answered the phone was rude and tells me they don't take delivery orders from out of town numbers. I tell her I just moved here and this is the only phone I have to use, she goes well I don't know what to tell you. SERIOUSLY !! You would rather lose a customer and money because you don't want to take an out town number.WOW! I just though that was pretty lame..................................

Well then! All this is very strange and stupid. First of all, is the computer ordering system really not sufficiently customizable to allow other area codes to be entered? Second, a recent study showed that upwards of 30% of U.S. households rely on cell phones exclusively, and this figure rises rapidly with youth. Aside from college neighborhoods, we're hard-pressed to think of an area of Chicago that would likely have a higher percentage of non-local cellphone users. We're as shocked as ".............." that John's would willingly and willfully abandon the business of such a significant (and presumably pizza delivery-oriented) demographic.

This is not the first time we've registered complaints about John's delivery service. Last April, "bri" wrote:

Pizza is fantastic, delivery service is decent-- it comes pretty quick, but the answering service is rather rude. a simple "thank you for your order/business" goes a LONG way-- there was NONE of this.

pizza is phenomenal. delivery is quick, but just had a rude obnoxious driver tonight with a minor mistake on order. Told me RC had no sugar and it was better for someone who has blood sugar problems than regular diet. Crazy or just a liar you decide

John's Pizzeria [MenuPages]
More people depend solely on cell phones [SFChron]

[Photo: apparently so! via hwayoungjung]

What could be more auspicious than opening a fabulous new restaurant on the day that the foie gras ban got repealed? This is how L.2O was welcomed into the world, and based on the reactions of Mike Nagrant at Hungry (who supplied that quote and also, magnanimously, the menu) and Judy Hevrdejs at the Tribune, L2O is already in the pantheon of Chicago's top restaurants. And with dishes that have descriptions like "lamb tartar, ebi shrimp, pickled peach, tarragon" and "gold egg yolk, kampachi, Kurobuta pork, sake" and "shabu-shabu medai, kombu bouillon, citrus, King Trumpet," this is not hard to believe.

The ball of Ossetra caviar you can't help but stare at is sitting on a bed of fluke; while this exact preparation is not on tonight's menu, you can get something similar in the $110-$140 range. A twelve course tasting menu is $165, and a four course prix-fixe is $110. Eh, we've seen worse. The photo is from the restaurant's official flickr pool, which is hot. When LEYE wants to do something, they really do it.

Anyway, we're excited.

First Sip: L2O [Hungry]
First Bite: L2O [Tribune]

L.2O [MenuPages]
L.2O [Official Site]

[Photo: Ossetra caviar on fluke at L.2O, LGras/flickr]

We got a detailed and pointed feedback on Sunday morning from Doopy Lupree, a local Classic Rock / Neo-soul / House band. Or at least, we're able to surmise as much from certain data we have access to; suffice it to say, it does not seem like the author is necessarily on the payroll of Naha. The email reads:

I do not like to see such negative reviews for such a great restaurant. I think the way Naha is categorized is misleading. It should be discribed as contemporary American, French technique, Mediterranean influences (chef Carrie Nahabedian is Armenian-American and her cousin Michael Nahabedian is Greek/Armenian-American). There is emphasis on seasonal, sustainable and local ingredients. Carrie Nahabedian has won her 3rd consecutive James Beard award nomination for best chef Midwest. They allow BYOB but the corkage policy is $25/ bottle unless a bottle is purchased from the wine list for each bottle brought, in which case the fee is waived. It can be romantic, however, it can also be very lively (read loud) when seated to capacity. The design of the room has a California vibe, I guess; and Chef Carrie Naha was executive chef for several years @ the Four Seasons in Beverly Hills, California. Perhaps this is where the confusion comes in categoizing this restaurant as "California." Naha is also considered to be a "slow-food" restaurant as few items are pre-made to ensure quality. Naha is also not cheap. Kindly amend your listing so that another user of your site does not leave a restaurant disappointed due to being misinformed.

Cheers,
Wants-To-Help

Anyway, in our defense, the price rating was and is accurate, and any serious reviewer could have looked at the menu and ought not be overly swayed by epiphenomenal nomenclature. Still, it's certainly true that more people should be reviewing Naha in greater number. And now that you know about the Buy One Bottle, Get The Second Uncorked Free policy, you have no excuse not to.

Naha [MenuPages]
Naha [Official Site]

[Photo: a Naha medley, SquarePegsHurt/flickr]

Much like Sixteen at the Trump Hotel before it, C-House — famed Ethiopian-Swedish chef Marcus Samuelsson's venture at the Affinia Chicago — has opened its door for breakfast only at first. This is a perfectly reasonable way to test the space and prep the staff, but the morning menu does not reveal too much of what's to come. Except that, much like Sixteen, it is very expensive.

No less of a personage than Phil Vettel checked out C-House over the weekend, reporting that "there are three versions of eggs Benedict, including one that includes generous slices of pastrami-style smoked salmon; that’s what I ate, and it was terrific."

One would hope so! It's $17. The smart money may be on the $22 lobster version, but there's always the $14 Canadian bacon for penny pinchers.

You know what else is $14 at C-House's breakfast? An omelet with tomato, mushroom, herbs or cheddar cheese. Pancakes with blueberry compote. Almond French Toast with vanilla maple syrup. Waffles with chestnut honey. Clearly, this is the "sweet" spot. Hahaha!

We referenced the pastrami smoked salmon eggs Benedict earlier; it is also possible to get pastrami smoked salmon as a side for $7. Why so much pastrami smoked salmon? And why aren't they calling it gravlax?

To answer the second question first, it's because gravlax isn't smoked, it's cured. If you want legit gravlax, you'll have to go to Magnolia Cafe, where gravlax eggs Benedict are served with wilted arugula, tomato and pesto hollandaise and house potatoes for $13. But we digress.

What's strange is, Mr. Samuelsson certainly serves gravlax at his flagship restaurant Aquavit in New York. Aquavit offers a $48 all-you-can-eat brunch smorgasbord that includes gravlax as well as any number of smoked salmons and herrings, Swedish meatballs and Danish Marys. Hello, why isn't that available at C-House?

Oh well. Lunch and dinner menus will be posted as they materialize.

C-House [MenuPages]
C-House [Official Site]

[Photo: gravlax, which is clearly not smoked, via Ben Harris-Roxas/flickr]

Park 52, Jerry Kleiner's recently opened upscale comfort food restaurant in Hyde Park, has been getting decent play in the neighborhood, all things considered. The Dish reports finding the place "packed" at 9pm on a weekday night, despite prices well outside the normal range for the area, and food alternately described as "limp," "dineresque," and "copycat." The Chicagoist went by over the weekend and found people "disappointed" that the restaurant's not open for brunch. We're sure a serious review will hit the internet sooner or later, but in the meantime, we have the restaurant's very first shill on MenuPages to share with you.

User: Patricia (correctly capitalized first names are so infrequently used for legitimate reviews that their presence raises eyebrows — you know, because real people are lazy and illiterate)

Title: Wow! Just what Hyde Park needed!! (use of sentence case makes us nervous. It's true that Hyde Park needed a sophisticated, modern restaurant of some sort, but the title plays into that notion too heavily. Also, non-ironic double-exclamations are frowned upon)

Rating: 5/5/5/5 (an amateur shilling tactical error. Clever shillers realize that 5/5/5/5 is a big red flag, and often go with 4.5/4.5/4.5/4.5 instead)

Review:

What a great place! Absolutely wonderfully decorated (if you like that sort of thing). Great eclectic menu (not really). Food cooked to perfection (cliche). Chef ad libbed on a mustard sauce because I'm allergic to tomatoes and mushroomsit was superb and complimented the meal extremely well (lovely detail, well-intertwined with the narrative)! I felt like I was downtown but didn't have to travel a long way to get home (talking point). Great job!!! Please don't get stalechange the menu every so often and stay upscale (the neg). Valet parking is great idea, but please advertise (this is, in fact, the advertisement). I called and was told to park in the lot around back, but would have gladly paid the $8 to have the car parked and returned for me (wow, what a lazy person. Also, if they're from the neighborhood, why are they driving here?). My friend and I had a lovely time and I am definitely going to make it a "spot" to meet friends for a beautifully comfortable but upscale time in the neighborhood (scare quotes around "spot" and multiple modifiers on "time" are suspicious). Fantastic!!!!! (tell us what you really think)

All this said, we're sure the food is fine, and Park 52 will likely do very well. But we'll only participate when it's fair and square!

Park 52 [MenuPages]

[Photo: glazed salmon at Park 52, Kids' Writer/flickr]

ZED451, the River North American-style churrascaria is opening tonight to much fanfare. We passed judgment on the restaurant a few weeks ago, contending that it would be a fun place to spend an evening, but the all-you-can-eat meat selection and chef-driven sides would probably never rise above "good enough" at this suburban-origin chain. Gastronomic Bypass was there the other night for their free preview dinner, and pretty much confirmed our suspicions.

So we were somewhat surprised when we got a review this morning entitled "Zed-understanding fine dining!" from Sandra Smith-Doghmi, co-owner of Red Carpet Concierge. She wrote:

From the front door to the rooftop garden the experience was fabulous. Douglas Wickard, GM and his staff welcomed, served and d the ultimate in Chicago Dining! It is compared to dinner at Oprah's home. Buffet style for the first few courses with butlers constantly wandering with rump roast, garlic steak, sirloin, filet, short ribs, orange bbq pork ribs, parmesan crusted pork medallions, grilled chicken breast & legs, citrus salmon and lamb. Oh, and you have to start out with the fondue meats appitizer, the best. Zed definetly offers something unique-beyond compare. A Chicago Concierge

If any actually unaffiliated people make it to ZED451 tonight and love it, please let us know.

ZED451 [MenuPages]
ZED451 [Official Site]
Red Carpet Concierge [Official Site]

[Photo: shiller Sandra Smith-Doghmi, Red Carpet Concierge]

We mostly like the framing of this, but also — sweater aside — it's hot out! Margarita time! Woo!!!

This particular specimen comes from Tecalitlan in Ukie Village for $6.20. A regular with lime is $5.50, but the very nice young woman who answered the phone when we called recommends the raspberry, her favorite. For our part, we always get plain because the fruit flavors are just sugar, and then we get a headache. When it comes to margaritas, though, you can do whatever your heart desires.

Have an uproariously enjoyable weekend!

Tecalitlan [MenuPages]

[Photo: allwood/flickr]

We're not positive we'd actually like this cupcake, but we're sure glad we've seen it, and we bet it appeals to at least some of you. Texture combinations aside, this looks like something out of Wonka or the Nutcracker, or maybe Marie Antoinette. The aesthetic is whimsy, but the reality is much starker: there are only three of these left at Bleeding Heart Bakery, where Michelle Garcia dreams up all manner of limited-time cupcakes that rotate in and out of the line-up. All cupcakes at Bleeding Heart are $3.50, but for your money you get something 1) unique 2) attractive and 3) organic.

Anyway, if popcorn's your thing, you know what you have to do.

Bleeding Heart Bakery [MenuPages]
Bleeding Heart Bakery [Official Site]

[Photo: Bleeding Heart Bakery/flickr. They put their cupcakes photos online. Why doesn't every restaurant do this?!]

The latest yogurt craze-inspired entrant to the Chicago restaurant scene is Starfruit, opening tomorrow in Ukrainian Village. Unlike competitors Berry Chill and Wow Bao (you knew they were serving Asian-style frozen yogurt, right?), Starfruit makes its parfaits, smoothies and frozen concoctions from kefir, a variant of yogurt with a high concentration of bacteria. But good bacteria! Starfruit uses "probiotic" a lot on its trippy, hypnotic website (the best Flash-driven restaurant website we've ever seen, by the way, even though we normally don't like Flash), a totally hot trend in 2008. The yogurt...it will cure all your medical problems! It will do your taxes!

On that topic, as a special promotion for their opening day tomorrow, Starfruit is offering, for free, small parfaits, smoothies and frozens (let's just call them that) plus one topping. All of this would normally be $5, so it's not a bad deal. Flavors include flavors-of-the-week like Pomegranate and Acai, plus all the standard berries, a handful of fruits, and vanilla and capppuccino. Some of the flavors are available in organic, an extra 50 cents. The toppings are more fun, ranging from fresh fruit to milk and honey granola, yogurt chips (in case you can never get enough) and most exotically, mochi balls (a buck for the first topping, and then 50 cents per).

We say, the more, the merrier on yogurt. But the best part is, the menu they sent us came in three versions with three different fonts. They've since determined one for the website, but the tri-font menu gave us the unique opportunity to share with you the design decision as it came together. Here are the three options:

1)

2)

3)

The first one has a Harry Potter-type thing going on, the second one is like playful late 1950s, and the third one is a bit American Girl Place, yeah?

So which one makes us think the most about groovy yogurt? Also, why not just use the same sans serif font that the Starfruit logo is in? Because sans serif is modern and forward thinking, but Starfruit's hippy-wellness-holistic angle requires a few serifs to put us in a time and place, and the curlycues in the first font are as close as you're gonna get. And so, that's the font they ultimately chose for the website. Branding, we think, is like one of those good bacteria! Best eaten fresh and cold.

Starfruit [MenuPages]
Starfruit [Official Site]

When Rosscoe's Chicken & Waffles opened last month, we cautioned that

trying to ride the coattails of the established LA institution doesn't sit all that well with us. We realize the owners are just trying to maximize their business, but given the dearth of decent dining options in the area, simply providing good food and decent service would have taken care of that. Using the name Rosscoe's (misspelled as it might be) just opens you up for increased scrutiny and ire.

Equally relevant is Roscoe's logo, which is also protected. The trademark has a disclaimer that states "NO CLAIM IS MADE TO THE EXCLUSIVE RIGHT TO USE "CHICKEN N WAFFLES" and the illustration of waffles APART FROM THE MARK AS SHOWN." Let's take a look at the mark!

The chicken on the left belongs to Chicago's Rosscoe's, while the chicken on the right is property of LA' Roscoe's. There are differences between them, to be sure; um...for example, they're looking in opposite directions. The owner of Chicago's Rosscoe's, Darnell Johnson, is quoted as saying:

In a court of law, in a civil case, we feel we can win 9 out of 12 jurors. If they get the whole story.

Nevertheless, this infringement suit seems to have legs, given that the "likelihood of confusion between the two is pretty high for unsuspecting Chicagoans. It's one thing to use the name "Rosscoe," which is a recognized variant of Roscoe (meaning "deer wood" in Old Norse) — after all, during the interwar period, one out of every two hundred male babies was named Roscoe!

But the similarity of the logos is pretty damning. At the end of the article, Johnson states he'd be fine changing the name except for the high cost of switching the signage. We're underwhelmed by this argument also, but doing so would be a lot cheaper — and arguably less insulting — than getting shut down by government injunction.

L.A. restaurant cries fowl over Chicago eatery's name [Tribune]
Roscoe's House Of Chicken N Waffles [USPTO]
Trademark infringement [Wikipedia]
Roscoe - Name Meaning and Origin [Think Baby Names]

[Photos: top, the appropriately titled "Our efforts thwarted" (Chicago White Meat/flickr); middle, our own construction using Google Maps Streetview and dcfud]

Last Friday, we wrote about our sticker shock when we saw the price of a certain (tasty-looking) main course at Szalas on the Southwest Side. We argued that we've come to expect Polish food in Chicago to be cheap, and we're somewhat suspicious when it's not.

This generated the slightest pique of ire from Louisa of Movable Feast, who was concerned we were reopening the X-food-is-meant-to-be-cheap message board war (veterans of which are currently suing for more generous meal stipends).

But we never meant to imply that there's a reason inherent to the cuisine itself for it to be universally inexpensive, or that we would not be willing to pay a lot for imaginative, high quality Polish food served in a sophisticated restaurant. It's just that, since such a venue empirically does not exist in Chicago, and because the overwhelmingly vast majority of Polish restaurants in the city are conspicuously inexpensive, that we've come to view Polish as a "value" option. In fact, we think there should be a temple to fancy Polish food in Chicago, and that there's a market for it.

However, commenter "Bart" disagrees:

There are no good Polish restaurants in the Chicago area, and I doubt you would find one in the US at all. Simply this kind of cousine doesn't sell, and is not existent except withing old country. For real taste of Polish cuisine try some more upscale restaurants in Warsaw, Krakow. But don't expect the bill to be running under $40-$50 per dish.

But truth is, Szalas is still serving it right, even if their menu is bit on a countryside - but you are served a traditional stuff.

The set menu (like a prix fixe except you don't have any options) includes pierogi, sour soup with smoked bacon, beef roulade in mushroom sauce with buckwheat and warm beetroot salad, "cream cake on the mirror of strawberry sauce" (!) and a glass of cherry vodka, and is 175 zloty, or $80, a person. That's not insignificant in a country with a per capita GDP of $16,600, around half that of the United States.

But only tourist eat set menu, yes? Should we ever find ourselves in Krakow, we are ordering: foie gras in wild rose and apple preserves ($42), crayfish soup with sour cream and dill ($16), and the roe deer and quail duet served with wild rice
and many-colour pepper sauce for $50. Ooh! Or maybe the veal leg stewed in dark mushroom sauce, served with roasted potatoes and sweet pea, a hefty $57. And we can't say we're not intrigued by the apple strudel with linden tree ice cream for $15. All this comes to upwards of $130 or so before beverages (tax and tip are mostly included, in all likelihood), which is nothing to sneeze at.

While an opulent, 650 year old Polish restaurant that regularly plays host to visiting foreign dignitaries may not be in the cards for Chicago, surely there's still room for something special, eh? Something with foie gras...

Szalas [MenuPages]
Szalas [Official Site]
Wierzynek [Official Site]

[Photo: Daniel Matysiak/flickr. That "GRILL" awning is atrocious]

ZED451 is an AYCE (all you can eat) New American steakhouse, opening in River North in two weeks. The restaurant is similar in concept to the various churrascarias around town like Brazzaz and Fogo de Chao, but with a New American rather than Brazilian orientation toward the meat and accompaniments. For a $50 prix-fixe ($25 for the kiddies), you get your pick of proteins like bacon-wrapped filet mignon, Parmesan crusted pork medallions, buttermilk marinated bottom sirloin, spicy fruit-glazed lamb chops, and so forth. And in lieu of a traditional salad bar, ZED451 employs a "Harvest Table" with sides like Maui pineapple salad, roasted asparagus with herbed aioli, and a "Hot Station" with options like sherry braised mushroom soup.

One mildly interested twist is that the restaurant employs thirty front-end chefs, who do everything from carving your meat to delivering it to your table. Furthermore, they get to show off their skills by making amuse bouches for the audience...er, dining guests. This is sort of like an audition so maybe you can hire them to be your corporate chef or something! We wonder if they wear name tags...

If ZED451 sounds familiar (the restaurant's name refers to the last letter of the alphabet and the temperature at which paper spontaneously combusts. All this makes us nervous that it's a doomsday cult), that's because there are already two in the area: Downers Grove and Schaumburg each have a location. It definitely feels like sloppy seconds to get a restaurant concept that got its start in the suburbs; we've learned by now to not assume that food served in the suburbs will be less sophisticated than its city counterpart, but...we cannot shake the associations of the soulless marketing immanent to restaurant groups in general, and these suburbs in particular.

The next best thing to judging a dish by eating it is to judge by looking at it (this is the premise behind Top Chef, by the way). Above are some encrusted lamb chops (apparently not the spicy fruit-glazed variety they have on the menu). They look...fine. More than adequate. There are chives in the foreground, cilantro in the background. Definitely a stab at upmarket. We look at these lamb chops and know instantly that the food will be good enough for the people who decide to go to this restaurant. It will be tourists and conventioneers and families and all sorts of people who appreciate high quality AYCE in a large (15,000 sq ft!), safe space. It at least has the virtue of being slightly different from other plausible alternatives in Chicago. Given the spiraling costs of meat, $50 for all the filet mignon you can eat is not a terrible deal.

ZED451 [MenuPages]
ZED451 [Official Site]

[Photo: ZED451's media center]

Last we checked in with Szalas, it was because an Omnivorous feature was designed specifically to accommodate the restaurant. To whit:

The restaurant round-up that follows Omnivorous this week is "Twenty-four restaurants south of 52nd Street," so themed because Gary is...south. But why 52nd street in particular, we wondered? A quick check of the addresses reveals the northernmost restaurant to be Szalas, a Goralean restaurant in Brighton Park. Come again? They're Polish highlanders, they eat veal goulash, and on the weekends, they dance. If the column was named to accommodate this particular restaurant, you know it must be good.

Right or wrong, Polish food is simply not a cuisine we expect to pay a lot of money for; Chinese and Mexican are also in this category. Thai and, say, Greek, are not anymore, because the gentrification of Thai and Greek food have inured us to $15 and up entrees. Which is not to say there aren't plenty of places to get delicious and cheap Thai and Greek food! But we're fine paying a little or a lot for either. Of course, Chinese and Mexican have been making inroads, too — witness Shanghai Terrace and Topolobampo.

As for Polish food, though, there's really only one "expensive" Polish restaurant in the area (Lutnia). This doesn't need to be the case! Any cuisine can be elevated to gourmet heights; all it takes is one enterprising and aesthetically gifted chef. But that hasn't happened yet in Chicago, which is why a $15.50 entree at Szalas is jarring. But hey, if they can get away with it — and again, this looks pretty tasty — more power to them.

Okay, have a good weekend then!

Szalas [MenuPages]
Szalas [Official Site]

[Photo: cohodas208c/flickr]

Lito's Empanadas, operating out of a little storefront in Lincoln Park, has built a nice reputation for itself since it opened late last year. We're happy to see a family-run place that decides to offer only one thing, and does a really good job at it.

Look how positive MenuPages reviewers have been!

Make it a point to get to Lito's. Lito's is a very small, sparkling clean place which has a few window seats for dining in. Much of their business seems to be take out. The empanadas which are fabulous, travel well and stay warm. Try my favorites: beef,olives,rainsins, rice or the beef and rice. My ultimate favorite is the choco-banana. The empanadas are inexpensive -a wonderful deal for the money. The owner and his wife are very friendly. These would be great to take to a party. If you are in the neighborhood, stop by. If you are not in the neighborhood, make it a point to get there. I am convinced you will not be disappointed.

Lito's empanadas range from $2.09 to $2.29 (regular unleaded, premium unleaded circa 2005?), with the beef and rice smack in the middle at $2.19. Which is a bargain, compared to how empanadas are priced elsewhere around town. Que Rico! does two cheese and spinach empanadas for $6.80 (but we didn't want two!); Cafe Ba-Ba-Reeba's are $5.25 a pop for your choice of chicken or beef; and it doesn't get much better from there. No, Lito's is pretty unique in what it's doing — if you've never had an empanada before, this is a good place to start.

Lito's Empanadas [MenuPages]

[Photo: R.A.M.O.N.E./flickr]

Last Tuesday and Wednesday, two reviews were posted for Bubba's Fried Turkey on 87th Street near Stony Island, bringing the grand total of reviews for that restaurant to...two. On further inspection, our two reviews seem to be the only such commentary on the entire internet! You know something's obscure when LTHForum, Metromix and Yelp all come up empty. And yet, they have an amazing URL (www.bubbasfriedturkey.com) and a relatively well-designed site.

Now when they say "fried turkey," they mean, battered and deep fried. This is not that new-fangled method from the South where you deep-fry the turkey instead of roasting it and it cooks faster but doesn't absorb any of the oil for some reason. No, the turkey is covered in yellow batter, like everything else on the South Side. Alas.

Let's check out the reviews. The first one, by "local resident" (a warning flag), was entitled "Something Different":

This is the great place to satisfy your taste buds when you are tired of the same ole' meals. Service is friendly and welcomes you once you come through the door. No attitudes here! Food is filling and resonable. The salmon with the fish and chips is a huge portion with great flavor. The turkey sandwich, fried, was light and tasty. Not the boring rubber sandwich that I usually receive. Be patient, this is not a fast food set up. Fast is not always good! The dinning atmosphere is good but not large. Clean. This restuarant is great change from the normal and the cook really cares about the quality of your meal.

The next review was from "tracey," optimistically entitled "healthy and good":

if you want something healthy and good this is the spot! when you go, get the turkey breast sandwich fried!! This is the best sandwich I ever had in my life!!

All that said, we're intrigued by the fried salmon fish and chips, and we appreciate the menu's warning that "products may contain peanuts." And fried turkey is not something we see on too many menus in Chicagoland. Shills or not, Bubba's is definitely doing something different.

Bubba's Fried Turkey [MenuPages]
Bubba's Fried Turkey [Official Site]

[Photo: from their website]

You all know by now that Grant Achatz was very seriously considering plopping a version of Alinea in New York, but has decided against it. In an email to Time Out New York, he writes:

Sure, it would have been easy for us to clone Alinea and plunk it down in Manhattan. But what does that get anyone? Sure, we make some money if it is successful, but really that is not compelling. It would mean cannibalizing the very philosophy that makes Alinea what it is. New York would have a knockoff, and it would stretch our resources here at Alinea to the point of jeopardy for no real gain to anyone.

1) Mr. Achatz could charge $400 for the Tour, and people would still pack the place. It would be disgusting.

2) Could it really be that someone out there is doing it for the art and not the cash? Bless you.

3) Certain things should be unique in the universe for deeply philosophical reason, and Alinea is a prime example.

4) New York simply doesn't deserve it. Really. It's too good for them. And we should know.

Even if one day, forces beyond our control dictate that Mr. Achatz launch a New York project, at least today, we can savor the victory of good over evil; that's how strongly we feel about it.

Exclusive: Achatz fills in the blanks on Alinea NYC [Time Out New York]
Alinea [MenuPages]
Alinea [Official Site]

* Note that we have virtually no emotional reaction to Charlie Trotter's entré into the New York market. Account for that as you will.

Which restaurant was angry former waitress "Dawn" talking about when she wrote in:

i have seen many cockroaches when i was working there as a waitress many people didnt tip me cuz of this and the manager was giving them the meals free when this happened,also the servers only work off of tips they dont get paid hourly,that is against the law

Well, we told her that everyone seemed to be really excited about the concept. This was partially because we didn't want to say anything negative this early in the morning, and partially because we'd only skimmed the data and didn't have much substantive to report. Now that we've woken up, the thrust of the commentary thus far as been:

1) The line is so long
2) Much of the early business is being driven by the false impression that Rosscoe's is related to Roscoe's, which comes off as...unsavory
3) The chicken and waffles are alright, although they may suffer long waits on the way from the kitchen to the table

Some of this can be chalked up to opening drama and growing pains, but trying to ride the coattails of the established LA institution doesn't sit all that well with us. We realize the owners are just trying to maximize their business, but given the dearth of decent dining options in the area, simply providing good food and decent service would have taken care of that. Using the name Rosscoe's (misspelled as it might be) just opens you up for increased scrutiny and ire.

We'll have more to report when we receive the menu.

[Photo: the eponymous dish, but from the actual Roscoe's in LA, pointnshoot]

No matter where you live, you've probably heard of this legendary Brooklyn pizza joint known as Di Fara's. If you haven't, welcome to the big leagues, pizza lovers!

Brooklyn is, by many accounts, the nation's pizza capital (sorry Chicago. It kind of is). And Di Fara's is, by many of those same accounts, the best pizzeria in Brooklyn. So logic dictates that Di Fara's is the best pizzeria in the nation. At least by many accounts.

And many of those accountable for this opinion weighed in on an Epi-Log poll and voted Di Fara's the best on the East Coast. The result? We get a virtual photo-walk-through of the process of making a Di Fara's pizza. Not surprisingly, it all has to do with one dedicated pizza master. According to Epi, Domenico Di Fara's recipe for quite possibly the best pizza on earth boils down to this:

"I use only the freshest ingredients, the bufala mozzarella from the town I grew up in, the oregano and basil from Israel, tomatoes from Salerno, flour from Italy," he says with a smile. "That's the secret recipe."

Secrets of Di Fara Pizza [Epi Log]
Photo credit: Michael Y. Park [Epi Log]

being on Michigan Ave. you'd think it's too posh to enjoy but not really. it's pretty cozy, dark, and private.

one thing though that threw me was the hostess... when we walked in she wrote down visual descriptions of us all the way down to the piercings in some sort of short hand. the only reason i saw it was because the waitress accidentally set the card down on our table when she was talking to us. i understood most of what was written about me, some of it made me go hmm but that was just weird and made me uncomfortable to know that detailed descriptions were being written down about us.

anyway, the waitress was very nice and the food was very very good. as per usual with Bandera. and pricing isn't too high but it certainly could be lower... but that's just my opinion and i really doesn't cross my mind when eating there.

I worked at Bandera for a little over two years and just wanted to clarify the previous reviewers unsettling experience with the extremely detailed description that the hostess took. Bandera refuses to use the pager/ beeper system feeling that it makes the dining experience much less personal. Thus, as a host, we have about a minute to take a quick description of the guest as we write down the name, time they came in, party size, and amount of time quoted. When you are on a twenty minute wait, it is extremely easy to find your guests. When you are on an hour and a half wait and have taken over 50 names, it becomes much more difficult - thus, the crazy descriptions. So- if you want to guarantee that the hostess will find you an hour and a half after you have put your name in - be a little more creative with your dress! You would be shocked on how many men / women wear jeans, black sweater and black shoes.

Just a quick follow up regarding the hostess description issue. Just to clarify, the hostess did not accidentally leave the card on the table. One is placed on every table, with the description in plain view (no one's trying to be sneaky here) so that the servers know if or if not the table has been greeted. Once the table has in fact had an initial greeting from a server, the card is either written on and or taken off the table by their server. Point being, there is no discriminatory system going on here.