Okay, part two of Liquid Friday is the obligatory hang-over cure roundup. Here are some oft-used tricks from our New Year's Day bag, as well as a few we pulled off the Web. Feel free to add your own.

1. Water the night before: An ounce of prevention and all that. Drinking a bunch of water after you get home and before you go to bed (and anywhere else you can during the night) will drastically reduce the sting of that fourth champagne toast. Here's a suggestion from a reader of www.hungover.net, but it only works if you're drinking bottles of beer that you open yourself, which is totally (un)likely:

Bill from Bondi, Australia says, "When I'm out on the squirt I take the top from every beer I drink and put it in my pocket. When I get home i count the caps and that's how many glasses of water I gotta get through. Works even better when you're seeing double."

2. Eggs and potatoes: Greasy, heavy food, especially eggs and carbohydrates, will sop up a lot of that nasty acid and stuff that's making your stomach die. Also, you get to eat them with friends at a diner, swapping stories of who was standing next to whom at midnight, who danced on what surface, and where that lampshade finally ended up, which should help get your mind off it. The website www.curemyhangover.com has this to say about eggs:

Eggs - Egg yolks contain large amounts of cysteine, which breaks down acetaldehyde, one of the culprits behind a hangover. Eggs are also a good choice if you don't feel like eating much due to the high amount of energy they provide. It's also believed that the high nutrient and fat content delays hunger.

3. Fluids and exercise: No, really, a bit of a workout will help. We're not just trying to be cruel. You basically sweat out the nasties. Don't kill yourself training for a marathon or anything, but a little moving around, breaking a sweat will do you good and make you drink more water. You should drink Gatorade, too. From www.health911.com:

Exercise will help get rid of your hangover by helping the body rid itself of toxins. The increased circulation gets blood and oxygen to your oxygen-starved brain. Exercise will help get rid of your hangover by helping the body rid itself of toxins. The increased circulation gets blood and oxygen to your oxygen-starved brain.

4. Take your vitamins: Overdoing it at the bar will sap your body of important vitamins, especially B vitamins. It helps to take a few in the morning to start replenishing your stores. There's a whole section on www.hungover.net about which vitamins help with what aspects of the New Year's flu.

5. Hate to say it, but, take it easy there, sport. One surefire way to cut down on that hangover is to avoid drinking too much in the first place. Try drinking a glass of water every other round. This will keep you hydrated and only half as pickled. Also, try setting your limit on drinks beforehand. Even if you don't exactly stick to it, the guilt of breaking your limit may keep you moderately in check.

Whatever you decide to do this New Year's, and whatever you must undertake to undo it, here's wishing you a fun evening, a midnight kiss and stories to last you well into 2008.

Happy New Year!

This seems like a good day to devote to booze. You'll probably be drinking a lot this week, and by next Tuesday you'll be ready to throw in the towel once and for all. Well, make a list and check it twice before you do, bub. Our friends at Modern Drunkard magazine have done so, to our delight. Some of these are really touching, some are hilarious and some are not bloody likely:

7.) Buy a crowded bar a round. For no reason at all. Jump up on a barstool and shout it loud: “A round for the house! On me!” Make sure you have a good toast ready, because, for once, they’ll all be listening.

There's also:

29.) Eat a pickled egg from the big jar.
A bar must own a certain amount of character to carry the big jar. Maybe you’ve seen one. A jar large enough to hold Jay Leno’s head, populated with slightly off-color eggs floating in a murky fluid. You always wondered what they tasted like and it’s time to find out.

And, of course:

20.) Sit in on an A.A. meeting.
Not all accomplishments are rum and games. File this under the heading of facing your fears. Just as Jonah found enlightenment in the belly of a beast, so will you. You may come to look at it as a sober examination of the safety net (or trampoline, as the case may be). You may view it as a cautionary trip to hell. Either way, you’ll never have to wonder again.

That last one's good. For a magazine that caters to chronic alcoholics, they can sure throw in a reality check once in a while. Anyway, you should really read the whole article.

40 Things Every Drunkard Should Do Before He Dies [Modern Drunkard]

As we follow the saga of St. George's absinthe through the diligent work of Camper English's Alcademics, it appears we've come to the end for this batch. Playing catch-up, it looks like, as of Saturday, the distillery was mobbed to death Saturday. It's likely any of their limited first run is left.

Stay tuned for the second batch, and check out the pictures on Alcademics.

Last minute shopping [Alcademics]

Sorry folks, still no Guardian. Guess it's just the San Francisco Weekly over Coffee this week:

And that's okay, because it looks like Meredith Brody got a visit to Bar Johnny, about which we've been curious. The former Tablespoon kept its head chef but revamped its personality into a "gastropub," serving small plates and starters. While Bar Johnny seems to have made the transition complete, including sliders on the menu, Brody doesn't seem too impressed. "This seemed more like discomfort food than comfort food," she claims. Ouch. [Bar Johnny]

[Editor's Note: Because of a tight holiday schedule and belated site update, we'll be posting the Weeklies over coffee and the Blender tomorrow. Sorry for the inconvenience.]

The Ethicurian ran a very nice Christmas Day article on eating locally during the winter. While it might be more of a challenge in Montreal to avoid buying long-distance produce, it is, apparently, not impossible.

That's a good reminder for us here in the Bay Area, where our mild winter makes it seem like anything could be in season locally at any time. In fact, that's not necessarily the case. While we do have a wider array of plants to choose from at local farms, it is still not endless. South American fruits and vegetables make their way onto Bay Area tables just as they do Canadian ones.

A good way to stay up on what's fresh, local and good is to talk to farmers at the farmers' market. With the holiday rush over and a lull in most work weeks, this next few days would be a good time to visit the market and not just shop, but linger, chat and get a feel for what your local farms are producing. Alice Waters would be proud.

Keeping it local in the winter [The Ethicurian]

While we wait for the San Francisco Bay Guardian to post its latest issue online, thus enabling us to run The Blender and the Weeklies Over Coffee, we thought this was an interesting tidbit from the Bauer blog: A breakdown on how he does ratings. A reader wrote with the following question:

"Please help me understand your rating system and particularly how you arrive at your overall rating. Let's use SPQR, for example. I agree the food is great and deserves the three and one half stars. However, you rated the service three stars and atmosphere only two and one half stars. It seems to me that the highest overall rating would be three stars, not three and one half. What am I missing?"

In response, Bauer breaks down his rating system, including his equation and judgment calls. But you'll have to go to his blog to see it.

The art and science of star ratings [Between Meals]

Welcome to an over-fed, under-exercised, rather bleary Chronicle Over Cocktails. Fortunately, the paper guessed our collective mood and has run some post-Christmas rebound articles.

The top story features a recipe for a French dish, pot-au-feu, offered by Laurant Manrique, executive chef at Aqua. The vegetable-and-beef stew is supposed to "clean the stomach" between Christmas and New Year's. [A One-Pot Wonder]

Michael Bauer makes a return trip to an old haunt, One Market, where Mark Dommen has been at the helm in the kitchen since 2004. Apparently Dommen is cooking some of the "best American-inspired food in the city." [Update: One Market chef's artistry shines]

Taster's Choice offers a year-end wrap-up of top panel-pleasers. Canned clam chowder made the list! [ >Taster's Choice]

And the Inside Scoop brings us news that the staff at Citizen Thai and The Monkey showed up to work Dec. 15 to find the restaurant closed and themselves out of a job. Merry Christmas! [ '_blank">Inside Scoop]

Okay, we're cutting it short today, so here's our glance at the Chronicle's Wine section a little early. Don't fret if you don't see any posts over the next few days. We're just taking some time off. Look out on Dec. 26th, when we'll have your roundups, and the rest of that week, when we'll be doing a little light holiday updating, including a pre-New Year's Eve "Liquid Friday." Happy holidays!

The big story this week is the Chron's holiday pairing guide, a multi-part feature in which the staff recommends a "glass of wine for every Christmas tradition." They also get into egg nog and other holiday cocktails. Fun! [Christmas Cheer]

Camper English brings us news of a $12,000 bottle of Scotch. Holy Moly, it's 55 years old and comes in a crystal bottle. [The sipping news]

The Cheese Course keeps it basic with a high-quality, lower-cost cheddar, Borough Market, which apparently has more expensive lines beat. [A bargain cheddar]

And we get a Camper spirit special, as English brings us a list of cocktails that leave out the booze, along with a feature on their growing popularity. [Virgin territory]

Some good investigative work by Camper English over at Alcademics:

Remember that big cover story in the Chronicle a few weeks back about Alameda's St. George, the only American distillery making absinthe? Well, today's the release date and Camper has the story. Apparently the stuff is going like hotcakes:

K&L Wine Merchants are sold out. They pre-sold all their supply.

The Jug Shop is sold out. (They were charging $69.99.)...

Wally's Wines (in LA) said they have 6 bottles left.

Want to know where you can still get it, and how quickly you have to move? Better check out Alcademics...

It'll hurt if I swallow [Alcademics]

We've been trying to avoid piling on the Cosco Busan coverage now that the San Francisco Bay fisheries are open (especially Dungeness!), but we feel compelled to bring you this punctuating moment in the saga.

Remember? This is the ship that crashed into one of the Bay Bridge towers, spilling 58,000 gallons of fuel oil into the Bay, which the Coast Guard didn't tell us about for hours and hours. Then the state had to close the waters in and around the bay for fishing right at the start of crab season. Yeah, you remember.

Well, the ship set sail yesterday and cleared both bridges on its way to Tsingtao, China. It was nice to see the stern, and we hope never to see any other part of the ship again. Don't let the Golden Gate hit you on the way out, Busan!

The Coastguard videotaped the Busan's departure. We've added a soundtrack (you have to push "play" manually). Enjoy.

Patched-up Cosco Busan sails out of bay, lawsuits in its wake [SF Chronicle]

Where was this article last weekend when we could have used it?

Ah, well, there's plenty of entertaining yet to be done this season, and if you're like us, you probably haven't started preparing for it. That's why this edition of The Minimalist in yesterday's New York Times was such a hit around here. These appetizer recipes are written like couplets, and make entertaining in style seem as easy as opening a couple of the right cans or jars and pointing them in the right direction:

On Bread or Crackers

1 Red peppers and anchovies: Drizzle piquillos or other roasted red peppers with olive oil, and top with a good anchovy fillet. A caper or two on each is not amiss.

2 Top rye flatbread with thin slices of crisp apple and pickled plain or schmaltz herring (not herring in cream sauce).

3 Sear skirt steak to medium-rare, not more than 8 minutes. Cut into chunks 1/2-inch to 1 inch, first with the grain, then against it. Spread bread with coarse mustard and/or butter. Top with steak and coarse salt.

4 Toss high-quality crab meat with minced shallots, a little tarragon or a lot of parsley and/or basil, and enough mayonnaise to bind. Also good on lettuce leaves.

5 Mash together best-quality tuna, minced anchovies, minced garlic, chopped oil-cured olives and olive oil as necessary.

That's the first five out of literally 101. You have nothing to worry about this holiday season.

101 Simple Appetizers in 20 Minutes or Less [New York Times]

Our first journalistic assignment not for the school paper came from the San Francisco Bay Guardian, where, as a fresh-faced intern, we were asked to compile a list of, well, anything. A Superlist, they called it, and all interns have to do one.

We thought it would be a good idea to publish a list of bars where you can legally smoke. Got the names from the health department and started calling down the list. Not one wanted to be included. Not even Amber.

So we killed the story. We used a thing called discretion. it was our first assignment, so we were green as can be, but still we understood that key concept. If only Tara Duggan had done the same thing yesterday.

Ms. Duggan, in reviewing DeAfghan Kabob House, Duggan apparently reveled in the establishment's BYOB policy. Look if you want, but the Chron has thrown that little doozy down the memory hole. Why? Well, according to her colleague Michael Bauer, because this is the response she got from the ABC:

"This is just a courtesy notification having to do with the restaurant located at 1303 Polk St. At the end of your excellent review yesterday, you mentioned that the establishment did not serve alcohol, but allows guests to bring their own. This is illegal ... I will be calling the restaurant later in the day to inform them of this. At the present time, we do not intend to file against the restaurant, but will assign undercover officers to drop by periodically to make sure that the practice has ended."

Come ON, Duggan! What's wrong with you? You're a professional journalist, for Christ's sake. Have you ever heard of keeping something off the record? You know how when you walk into a BYOB place and you ask the server if it's BYOB and they're like, "Um, no, wink?" Did you ever think there might be a reason for that?

Well, folks, expect to have a lot fewer bottles of two-buck chuck on the table at [censored], and you can forget about a cold beer at [also censored]. Here's betting no restaurant in San Francisco will let you so much as bring in your own Coca Cola now. Thanks a lot, Tara. [Via Eater SF]

Bargain Bite: De Afghan House [SF Chronicle]
BYOB? Don't even think about it [Between Meals]

Holiday shopping, planning and doing is all so tough. By the time New Year's Eve comes around it's all you can do to put on a suit and leave the house. But then you remember you didn't make reservations anywhere, and you just have to go back home, hang it up and watch the ball drop on TV or something. Or you can go to Clooney's.

So take care of it early. The internets have made it easy to do stuff like reserve tables and buy tickets and make it look like you're working. Check out this Zagat post that lists local joints with openings on the big night. Unless you like Clooney's and its ilk. We spent last year in some no-name dive bar across the street from a place we couldn't get into and had just about the best night ever. So there you go.

Space Still Available for New Year's Eve [Zagat]

Menu for Hope IV seems to be cranking along just fine, but there's always room for more giving. Chez Pim, the event's creator, suggests giving raffle tickets as presents. This is a great idea. People get too much junk on Christmas anyway, while these tickets and prizes support a worthy cause and often leave little environmental footprint.

For those of you unfamiliar with Menu For Hope, it's an event started to help victims of the 2004 Tsunami. Participating food bloggers offer prizes, including meals, cookbooks and kitchen equipment, then readers buy raffle tickets and hope they win those prizes. Pretty simple, and at $10 a ticket, an affordable gift. Go here for a list of participating blogs.

Are you behind on your Christmas shopping list? Give them hope! [Chez Pim]

Valentine's Day, Schmalentine's Day. Based on our own experience and asking a few friends, we've scientifically proven that the weeks between Thanksgiving and New Year's are the time of year where more people couple up than any other.

Think about it: The weather turns cold and you start thinking more and more about having a warm pair of arms to come home to. There are parties galore, many of which, like work events, bring different social circles into contact. There's even a party that includes a traditional midnight kiss.

With all this intrigue, you're going to need a place to take your date. That's why this thread on Chowhound, calling for a less-than-$50 romantic dinner, will come in handy, however misguided.

It is misguided, of course, because the original poster wants a place to have an anniversary dinner. Now, unless you work for minimum wage or are on social security, you need to spring for a better anniversary place. But $50 is just about right for a first or second date. It's nice enough so that you don't look like a cheapskate, but cheap enough to write off if the date goes bad.

There are some good suggestions on this list, including the Hog Island Oyster Co. picnic. What could be better than slurping and sipping on a brisk West Marin afternoon? There are also plenty of traditional choices, too. But don't listen to those posters who recommend not getting drinks. The idea is romantic, not puritan.

SF romantic dinner for under $50 for two. Possible? [Chowhound]

Here's your roundup of the weeklies, just in time for that afternoon coffee break:

From the San Francisco Bay Guardian:

Paul Reidinger pays a visit to the new location of India Clay Oven, on Church Street. While the tech boom had some ill effects on the city, Reidinger claims, a rash of good Indian restaurants catering to Indo-American workers was not one of them. [Church of the holy tandoor]

L.E. Leone seems to have gotten her column changed around so that the actual restaurant review only takes up the last paragraph. That's actually okay, if you spend the rest of the time talking about something interesting. Usually Leone does this. Sometimes, she doesn't. [Cheap Eats]

Finally, Reidinger, who reviews books as well as restaurants, tosses us a gift idea--a book about food and culture--that we're sure, if he didn't get it free from the publisher, he'd want to find in his stocking. [Feeding the food brainiac]

Meanwhile, over at the SF Weekly:

Robert Lauriston gives Meredith Brody the day off and joins the chorus of new fans of SPQR. It's nice how he goes through the menu, section by section. The review feels like it delivers actual information, instead of just one person's opinion of how awesome the place is. [As the Romans Do]

God Bless Gridskipper. This is why we like them. The best coffee in San Francisco. That's a list to print out, fold up and look at from time to time. This town is no Seattle, but it does run on caffeine, and some of the best shows up on the GS list.

It'll be hard for us to weigh in here, as we haven't been to all these places and some, such as Philz and Farley's, have been overused, due to their proximity to the home or office. But you should chime in. Got a favorite? Did they forget anything? Go check it out.

A San Francisco Cup O' Joe [Gridskipper]

Here's our weekly re-print of the San Francisco Bay Guardian's Blender. Back later with a roundup of the weeklies for your afternoon coffee break.

(1) Mutton Dum Pukhta, Sultan

(2) Illy coffee and fresh grapefruit

(3) Trader Joe's dark chocolate–covered caramel

(4) Roasted rabbit leg, Serpentine

(5) Paneer Tikka Kati Roll, Bollyhood Café

The Blender [SFBG]

Wow, the Chronicle's food section is bursting at the seams today. Food news is bleeding onto the front page and mingling with the development beat. Love it.

First off, an A1 feature about how celebrity chefs are setting up shop in luxury condo complexes. Seems all the amenities in the world and a view of the loveliest city ever aren't enough for high-end condo buyers. Now they want big-name chefs, too (we are so. freaking. jealous). [As upscale home complexes add great chefs, more buyers are biting]

More big-name boot licking, as the food section goes "inside the celebrity chef's studio" for a look at what your favorite four-stars are serving their families this year. [Four-star feasts]

Over at Taster's Choice, we get a look at the effect of two words that sound disturbing together: Budget caviar. It sounds like the tasters were less put off by this idea than we are, but none of the entries really banged the gong. [Taster's Choice]

Inside Scoop gives us a look at Globe head chef Joseph Manzare's response to Monday's fire. Seems Manzare was having a little nap when the flames broke out, but a quick-thinking floor-staff averted a major crisis. [Inside Scoop

And, just in time for Christmas, it looks like Jones Soda has introduced a number of new flavors, including pine. [What's New]

The recently re-opened Luisa’s restaurant at 1851 Union St. had “a severe cockroach infestation throughout the facility,” a San Francisco health inspector said today.

The San Francisco Department of Public Health suspended the embattled restaurateur’s license after the kitchen of her flagship business failed a Dec. 6 health inspection, Principal Environmental Inspector Lisa O’Malley said. The restaurant was closed for a week while repairs were made to “dilapidated” walls, and exterminators cleared the place of roaches and mice.

The restaurant’s troubles with the health department come on the heels of a controversial takeover and closure by Hanson of the 40-year-old John Barleycorn pub at 1451 Larkin St. Barleycorn staff and patrons very publicly resisted the takeover, criticizing Hanson harshly. Even Supervisor Aaron Peskin chimed in, characterizing Hanson as a “mean nut.”

Now, the businesswoman faces new opposition, this time from the Department of Public Health. In an inspection Dec. 6th, O’Malley said Luisa’s racked up two “high-risk” violations, one medium-risk and four low-risk. The most serious violations include an infestation of cockroaches, and “adulterated” food. What was the food adulterated with, you ask?

“The cockroaches and the mouse droppings were on the food… on the tomatoes and potatoes,” which were being stored improperly, in open containers, O’Malley said.

Neither Hanson nor property manager David Pietras immediately returned calls seeking comment, but we’ll be sure to update our coverage if they do.

Meanwhile, O’Malley said, the restaurant closed for a week while workers repaired drywall, exterminators sprayed, and unsanitary non-stainless-steel kitchen fixtures were removed. On Dec. 14, the place was re-inspected and passed, O’Malley said.

“When we suspend a permit and they do a lot of work, it’s important that the department does a re-check every few weeks to make sure they’re staying on track. That’s something we’ll be doing,” O’Malley said. “If it reverts back to what we saw, we’ll go to a [SFDPH] director’s hearing and we’ll push for a revocation of her permit.”

Hanson’s entrepreneurial career has been tarnished by controversy in the past. The blog luisaconfidential reports that she has been involved in 57 distinct lawsuits since 1987, 41 as a defendant. Back in October, the San Francisco Bay Guardian reported that Hanson, “obtained licenses for more than 22 businesses in the past two decades, most of which closed within two years or never opened at all.”

Well, at least Luisa’s is back open, but it’s unlikely that we’ll be making a reservation there anytime soon.

Legal History: A Summary [Luisa Confidential]
John Barleycorn Must Die [San Francisco Bay Guardian]
Luisa's health inspection score [SFDPH]

So 7x7 took a video camera to SPQR and, for the second time, we got to see Nate Appleman, executive chef at A16 and now at SPQR, wax philosophic. This time it was about fried chicken. When asked what he would want for his last meal on earth, Appleman said, "fried chicken and chocolate chip cookies."

Well, that rang a bell. You know who wants fried chicken in spades? Convicts. You may remember our appalled/fascinated discovery of the Texas Death Row last meals website (shudder). A whole bunch of those convicts wanted fried chicken. Many also wanted chocolate chip cookies. It's pretty easy to understand why--fried chicken and chocolate chip cookies are both delicious and both comfort foods. But still, for a high-end executive chef, the heavily tattooed Appleman has some very simple tastes. This makes us like him even more.

We liked him when we first saw him in an A16 video and we like him a whole lot, now. Could Appleman be poised to join Paul Reidinger on our professional crush list? Probably not. We're not a chef. But it does seem like it's about time to start working on lining up a kitchen visit to SPQR. Maybe with a lunch invitation thrown in. Here's the video:

In a world soon to be full of top 10 lists, Line Cook already has us all beat. This rundown of the top five reasons to work as a cook, coupled with the top five not to is really funny and totally true. Some of them translate to waiting tables and some of them not, but all of them are relate-able and the dichotomy is really funny.

For example:

5. You'll be a [censored] cook, man! You'll put on great dinner parties, be able to taste flavors you never noticed before, and have an absurd amount of cooking technique at your disposal. A knife and a sautee pan in hand will be second nature.

5. You'll be a [censored] cook, man! Beyond the stresses and pains of work, when you go to dinner parties, the host will either be terrified of you, or enlist you to help out. Or, you just won't be able to ignore just how bad their technique is...and it might ruin a great many meals for you.

Haha, and it goes on like that. Read it.

5 reasons you should be a cook. And five more reasons why you shouldn't [Linecook]

Guy Fieri looks like he should be driving a restored Chevelle around Alameda. And what's with the mismatched drapes and face-carpet? But he's right on about Grubstake. It's fun to see one of the cornerstones of the local restaurant scene featured on the Food Network. Check it:

Oh, wait, no, it's this restaurant. And we get to make jokes because it seems the single alarm fire that forced the evacuation of the Globe on Pacific Avenue caused no injuries and at least reparable damage.

Okay, so it's never good when somebody's business gets hurt, but hopefully the insurance will take care of them. It sounds accidental. From the Chronicle:

Firefighters received a call about a fire at Battery Street and Pacific Avenue at about 8:11 p.m. and arrived at the intersection to find a large group of people outside the Globe restaurant at 290 Pacific.

A fire that started in the grease flue of the kitchen had spread to the ceiling, said Batallion Chief Alson Lee. He said the fire in the one-story restaurant was brought under control in 15 or 20 minutes.

This story is something of a relief. The last restaurant fire we reported on was not so low-impact. That blaze, on Nov. 29, destroyed the Star of India and killed San Francisco resident Frank Dias, 35, and Sunnyvale resident Anil Middekadi, 24 who were sleeping in the restaurant.

The Star of India fire also damaged Pasha, which has remained closed. A worker at the restaurant said today that the management hoped to re-open in the first week of January.

Let's hope Globe gets off easier.

SF fire damages popular restaurant [San Francisco Chronicle]

One unique thing about working at Menupages is that one reads hundreds of menus, all the time, from every restaurant in town. We're betting Frank Bruni doesn't even get through as many menus in a week as we do in a day.

That's why it was really funny to click onto the Diner's Journal and see this essay on menus as literature. Bruni's take on long-winded menu-item descriptions seems echo ours, but his apparent disdain for such "culinary pedagogy" may be more pure, stemming, as it does, from his analysis of the trend, and [supposedly] not the fact that it simply makes his job a much bigger pain in the rear.

Whatever your reason for thinking so, the fact remains that surrounding each menu item with acres of prose is often distracting and lame. However, this is not always the case. As one commenter on Bruni's post states, "the person who prepares [the dish] does not always get the opportunity to verbalize the history, tale, myth,legend, or meaning it has to its maker."

That reminded us of a very compelling episode of To The Best Of Our Knowledge, that inimitable Public Radio International production that keeps us glued to the exercise bike that extra five minutes. In the episode Food Stories, which aired on Nov. 24, we hear the story of Boris, a 700-lb pig that was eventually turned into sausage after a long, happy life as a sire.

Dan Barber, proprietor of Blue Hill restaurant in New York City, as well as Blue Hill at Stone Barns, tells the story of Boris, expounding on the physical, social and moral ramifications of butchering the pig. In the end, he says, diners liked the meat better for having heard the story, as it drew a connection between them and their food. In that case, a prosaic menu did not seem to be an annoyance.

But when, to use Bruni's example, you get pages and pages of this... (from a place called Tequila's in Philadelphia)

“Trenza (braids) are par excellence the most fashionable style for the country woman,” the description begins, continuing: “Nothing is more beautiful than an imposing and timid country woman, adorned with the complex knots that crown her head. Our chef gives this rich dish . . . the look of the trenza worn by our Mexican heroines.”

...the story begins to get in the way of the dinner, not add to it. The conclusion menu writers should draw from all of this is that long menus are fine, if you've got something to say, but most of us come to dinner to eat and talk, not sit and read, so please, keep it succinct.

Menus As Literature [Diner's Journal]
Food Stories [To The Best Of Our Knowledge]

Gutenberg gets around, that's for sure. The Bunrab foodie posts local meal pictures daily, as well as getting really crazy with the Korean street food on a business trip.

But we have never been as jealous of him as we are today. Check out the report from the French Laundry holiday party. Salmon tartare cones? Really? Wow. It's enough to make you want to eat there. Here's one photo, but you've got to check out Bunrab for the rest:

The French Laundry Holiday Party [Daily Feed]

Our faint libertarian streak shows a little when faced with the idea of legislating health and safety.

While it's a good idea to force restaurants/food manufacturers into full disclosure of their ingredients and health ramifications, it's different to force them to change those ingredients. Similarly, while it's good to force businesses that sell unhealthy products to post the dangers of said products, it's the start of a slippery slope of government intrusion to punish those businesses.

So when Matier and Ross reported today that Mayor Gavin Newsom wants to charge stores a fee for selling soda pop, we weren't exactly livid, but we did frown slightly. From the Chronicle:

"The bottom line is that there is a direct nexus between high-fructose corn syrup drinks like colas and Big Gulps and obesity among schoolkids," Newsom said Friday.

The idea of taxing soda to combat obesity - which is being touted as the first in the nation - has been roiling around in health circles for some time, including backing from the American Medical Association.

In San Francisco, Newsom said a recent Health Department survey found that 24 percent of fifth-, seventh- and ninth-graders were overweight and that high-sugar drinks accounted for 10 percent of the kids' caloric intake.

All in all, he said obesity accounts for tens of millions of dollars of the city's health costs.

Now Newsom wants the soda sellers - primarily big-box retailers and chain drugstores - to chip in for his "Shape Up San Francisco" program and for media campaigns to discourage the soda habit.

Well, that's fine. But where does it stop? Will Newsom try for a punitive tax on video games? Candy? How about cigarettes? In New York they cost $7 a pack. He could make them $8. There are a lot of unhealthy things in the world, and while it makes sense to regulate them, it's a bit unfair to punish people for them.

Yes, kids are too fat, but punishing sellers of soda pop seems like an ineffective quick-fix. Especially when the money would go to a mayoral program. Maybe the fee would make more sense if the revenue went directly to new PE equipment for the school district or longer supervised hours at public pools. Honestly, what kid is going to be inspired to exercise by this"?

Newsom considers city fee for sellers of sugary soda

How would you like to cook a meal that you can't smell, taste or eat? That's the fun of the first cooking video game (we've heard of) since Burger Blast.

A story aired on National Public Radio Saturday about a Nintendo Wii game called Cooking Mama, kind of a gourmand's Guitar Hero, that simulates the job of a chef by making the player cut, prep and cook meat and vegetables and other stuff.

In classic NPR fashion, reporter Andrea Seabrook duels with chef Barton Seaver, of Hook in Washington DC in a contest that, over the radio comes out about as exciting as the nonexistent beef in wine sauce created by the two in the game.

But plenty of video games have made boring stuff fun and fun stuff boring in the past. Remember that level in Parrapa the Rappa when you have to sell stuff at the flea market? If this game is anywhere as good as Parrapa, we'll buy a Wii right now.

The funny thing about this NPR story is, obviously, the question of whether one needs to be better at video games or at the things they simulate, to beat the competition. Seabrook fancies herself a skilled gamer, but is she a match for Seaver? You'll have to listen to find out.

"Cooking Mama" a Delectable Digital Cook-Off [NPR]

Okay, The Chronicle's answer to Frank Bruni has been busy, so instead of doing a whole Chronicle Over Coffee, we're just going to focus the following roundup on Michael Bauer:

First, there's the review of SPQR, the Fillmore sibling to A-16. Bauer indicated a couple weeks ago that it would receive a pretty glowing review, and so it has. That's fine, but what's funny here is that this has got to be the worst-protected review in the history of criticism. First, Bauer himself spills the beans in his blog, then Eater SF gets the review, scheduled for Sunday, on Thursday. Is this a press release or an editorial work? Can someone tell us? [Not one miss in the Italian- inspired menu at SPQR]

Next, in his blog, Bauer takes sides with a fussy customer who can't stand it when the wait-staff pours his wine. While we can understand how this customer would get a little annoyed at this particular service quirk, it's lost on us why this is A) worth blogging about and B) worth the 30 comments debating the merit of the question. This right here is what happened to American productivity. [Stop pouring my wine!]

Finally, in Pizza Friday, Bauer takes on another service bald spot in the form of Pizetta 211, a Richmond District haunt famous for great pizza and an "abrupt" wait-staff. The normally videotaped segment took the form of a simple write-up this week because, according to Bauer, "when we called to set up a shoot, the videographer was turned away and told that each time something is written, the restaurant has a rush and the staff isn't able to accommodate the regulars." So become a regular or be the enemy of this restaurant. [Pizza Friday]

Saturday was the Day of Hundreds of Santas here in San(ta) Francisco as Santacon 2007 swept through the city, flooding bars and restaurants--but mostly bars--with thirsty, red-suited patrons. This, apparently, is what Burning Man types do in the off-season.
Some highlights include the Santas' trip to hooters, where the staff got a momentary respite from the gaze of the non-santa customers. A few hundred also hopped a ferry to Oakland. There's nothing like a boatload of Santas cruising across the bay.
A brief search on Flickr yielded some photostreams that we're linking here as well. Because Santacon is about the memories--which must be captured on film as they do not exists in the minds of the inebriated participants.

Kjmurray's Santacon Photos [Flickr]
Affinity1's Santacon Photos [Flickr]
Tpbrown's Santacon Photos [Flickr]
Santarchy Invades the Hooters at Fisherman's Wharf [Sfist]

TGIF, folks. Take a look at this roundup of the San Francisco Chronicle's Friday wine section, then head out for happy hour!

The big story is a very practical one, dealing with wine storage methods. Turns out just jamming the cork back in isn't the best way to ensure fresh tasting liquid leftovers. Maybe more people should take a page out of this guy's book. [Can this wine be saved?]

Belgian beer bars seem to be quite the hot ticket these days. The Trappest opened in Old Oakland last week. We get a glimpse inside to see what all the fuss is about. [First Look]

Camper English touts Anchor Brewing's new Genever gin [The Sipping News

Looks like that strange wine bar VinoVenue, where they served small glasses out of machines, has closed. [VinoVenue shuttered unexpectedly, evicted from storefront]

And in Pairings, it's time for a nice plate of braised beef cheeks--that's the cheek of the cow, in case there was any confusion. They apparently go well with Amarone, a hefty, red Italian wine. [Pairings]

Here, in the nick of time, is our new favorite news story of the year, discovered by the inimitable Camper English, who posted it on his Alcademics blog. Seems a man who was carrying a bottle of vodka in his carry-on luggage couldn't bear to part with it or check it, so he chose the only feasible option.

New airport rules prohibit passengers from carrying larger quantities of liquid onto planes, and he was told at a security check he would have to either throw out the bottle of vodka or pay a fee to have his carry-on bag checked.

Instead, he chugged the vodka — and was quickly unable to stand or otherwise function, police said.

Camper appropriately asks, what brand of vodka was it?

We just wish we had that guy's excuse. We had to buy our bottle at duty-free.

Stay tuned for more from Camper English later today with the Chronicle Over Cocktails.

Jet Fuel [Alcademics]
Man Nearly Dies After Drinking Bottle Of Vodka [Spiegel Online]

Well, the list is up. The San Francisco Convention and Visitor's Bureau has revealed the restaurants participating in the seventh annual Dine About Town, that big ol' prix fixe fest that goes down during the second half of January.

The deal, in case you don't frequent the SFCVB, is that participating restaurants offer $21.95 prix fixe lunches or $31.95 prix fixe dinners. In some cases, it's a hell of a deal. You have to shell out extra for wine and tip, but the meals come with three courses, so that's nice.

Check out the list and make a reservation here:

Seventh Annual Dine About Town [Open Table/SFCVB]

Well, the health department apparently did. After noting the "temporary" closure, announced by a handwritten sign, of controversial restaurateur Luisa Hanson's flagship, Luisa's, Eater SF dug a little deeper yesterday and hit on the real dirt, so to speak.

Turns out Luisa's was/is something of a haven for critters, especially rodents, according to a San Francisco Department of Public Health report, which indicated a "high risk" of rodent contamination. Ouch. In addition, the report stated that "adulterated food" posed a high risk. Luisa's got a score of 64 overall, losing more points for

Now, we don't take any particular pleasure in watching a restaurant slide out of business due to shoddy health code adherence. It's gross and sad. But there are plenty of people in this city who will be dancing a little jig on the grave of Luisa's, should it close its doors permanently. Hanson has not made friends with her business practices, most notably her recent takeover and closure of the beloved John Barleycorn pub.

What does the future hold for the troubled Hanson restaurant empire? At least, let's hope, a stiff new round of health inspections. Eeewwww!

Breaking: Rodents, Health Dept. Shut Down Luisa's [Eater SF]
San Francisco DPH score for Luisa's [SFDPH]

As strange as it may seem for a tech media mogul to open a chocolate company, it's really not that weird. Ever since Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory took us inside the magical world of a real-life candy factory, big, crazy machines and mythical creatures have seemed par for the confectionary course.

That's why Tcho, the new line of chocolates from Wired founder Louis Rossetto is a little disappointing. While we haven't been inside the factory, it's almost certain that the small company uses few outrageously complicated machines and even fewer mythical creatures.

Instead of applying the mid-century tech model to his company by mass-producing as furiously as possible, Rossetto is apparently utilizing the Internet start-up mode instead. The New York Times described Tcho as a "startup, while Rossetto himself says the company is, “where Silicon Valley start-up meets San Francisco food culture.”

Like an Internet startup, Tcho runs on financing right now, but unlike said startup, most of the capital comes from friends and family, according to the Times. Also, unlike many of the companies that Wired saw biting the dust in 2001, Tcho has something to sell by which it can make money: $4 bars of artisanal chocolate.

Ha! Maybe they can get the team from Kozmo to deliver them. (Sorry, team. You were great, really)

Chocolate in Beta Testing, Offered by a Wired Founder [NY Times]

(Above: is this the kind of ingredient distribution they're teaching our students at San Francisco State University?)

There's a lot of interesting stuff being said in the local food blogs right now, but none of it is quite post-worthy on its own, so here's a little roundup:

Becks and Posh seems to really love Serpentine, we think. [Piss off From My Hood and Leave Serpentine for Me]

Bunrab's got some beautiful pictures up of sushi at Hime, in the Marina. [Daily Feed]

Chez Pim is doing a great job spearheading generosity among food bloggers [Menu for Hope IV]

Burritophile's Burrito Files gives us a glimpse into the nether burrito regions of the San Francisco State slabbery, ironically located in the Cesar Chavez Student Union [Burrito, Student Style]

The Line Cook has posted a list of goals for 2008, including hunting, killing, butchering and eating an animal--an admirable, if unsustainable, objective for morally honest carnivores. [Goals for 2008]

And at Alcademics, Camper has been running himself ragged trying to do our collective alcoholic homework for us. Thanks, buddy! [Two big nights, two slow days]

This is a sad day for the Bay Area and for independent music fans everywhere. We just got word that Skankin' Pickle guitarist Lynette Knackstedt died last Friday. She was 37. No word on the cause of the death yet. The SF Weekly reports that Knackstedt died at her practice space.

Skankin' Pickle was a staple of the 90s Bay Area punk scene, and was also one of the major bands of the third-wave ska revival. All our sympathy goes out to Knackstedt's loved ones. We know we promised a break from the videos, but we really want to show you this fantastic live footage, in which Knackstedt sings some great backing vocals and there is a rap in tribute to Oakland native son MC Hammer:

Skankin' Pickle guitarist Lynette Knackstedt dies [SF Weekly]
In Memoriam: Lynette Knackstedt of Skankin' Pickle (1970-2007) [Punknews.org]

Okay, we'll try to make this the last non-local video post for a while, but you have to see this. If you happen to have a vacuum machine hanging around the kitchen, this grown-up Jello shot would make a great party food. Otherwise, just marvel at how weird and cool (and, frankly, delicious) it looks. We imagine that if Telstar Logistics had a food section, this is what would be in it.

As it is, here's how the folks over at Telstar take their cocktails:

The Edible Martini [NY Times]

OMG, if there's one thing we love around here more than overeating, drunken monkeys and local crime stories, it's bad, forced puns. This movie has them in spades. [Waiterrant]

Here again is our weekly look at our weekly papers over our daily afternoon cup of Joe. Enjoy.

From the San Francisco Bay Guardian:

Paul Reidinger has dinner in the once-more burgeoning Glen Park neighborhood, at a new French bistro, Le P'tit Laurent. While some of the feedback shies away from outright enthusiasm, Reidinger gives his rare cassoulet stamp of approval right off the bat. [Le P'tit Laurent]

Amber Peckham has nothing but praise for Live Sushi Bar, a Potrero Hill "needle in a haystack" that apparently features a very cute women's bathroom. [Live Sushi Bar: Good sushi, cute bathroom]

And LE Leone gives us another philosophical essay with a paragraph at the end about a restaurant, this time Pizza Orgasmica. [Cheap Eats: Antidepressants]

From the San Francisco Weekly

In a very blog-linked review, Meredith Brody pays two long-winded visits to Sens, workplace, we hear, of Eggbeater maven Shuna Fish Lydon. Normally, we'd leave it at that, but you may also check out the funny associated post in Le Blog De San Francisco snarking on Brody and her drinking habits. [Sens and Sensibility]

As always, here's a reprint of the SFBG's Blender. We'll be back later with The Weeklies Over Coffee:

(1) Zachary's Special deep-dish pizza, Zachary's Chicago Pizza, Berk.

(2) Borscht and latkes

(3) Deep-fried lobster spring rolls, Ah Sin, Las Vegas

(4) Dewar's, Cantina, SF

(5) Butternut squash mashed with birch syrup

The Blender [San Francisco Bay Guardian]

Check it out, everybody, we made Time Magazine's Top 10 Websites list! How cool is that? Answer: Very.

Now, we're not number one or anything--in fact we come in a middling (but respectable) sixth. Upon first seeing the number one slot went to a site called Lemonade.com, which at first glance looks to be all about setting up a lemonade stand, we were understanding. Who doesn't like lemonade, and where does lemonade taste better than at a stand?

But then it turned out that Lemonade.com is actually some weird 21st-century pyramid scheme widget, and we were disappointed. But then it turned out that it's not exactly a pyramid scheme because you don't have to pay in, and we were less disappointed.

Anyway, the point, here, is that Menupages.com, an incredibly useful and user-friendly website, made the list, and we'd like to thank you, dear readers, for your traffic and your buzz. Happy holidays.

Top 10 Websites [Time]

Okay, reader, in case you didn't get your Chronicle today or you just haven't braced yourself against the elements yet, here's a peek at what's in the food section:

Amanda Gold supplies a list of potentially give-able cookbooks, but if you're ordering online, you'd better get to it, as most websites have today or tomorrow as the deadline for orders to arrive by Christmas Eve. [Cook's Books: Bevy of books for the home chef]

Ms. Gold also takes us into the kitchen, where she is browning butter, a nice tip for all that holiday baking that you'll surely have time to do. [Liquid gold: What could be better than butter? Wait until you try browning it.]

There's also a unique and insanely complicated recipe for seafood chowder that sounds delicious if you could ever possibly get it right. [South to North: Seafood chowder, Patricia's way]

Over at Taster's Choice, the panel reviewed sugar-free chocolate. 'Nuff said. [Taster's Choice: Sugar-free chocolate sweetens holidays]

It seems Chronicle Staffer Olivia Wu, whose Seafood by the Season column has always entertained us, is leaving the paper to ope