Construction was impervious to failure, and we quite enjoyed the pea/carrot-flecked Spanish rice. But serious cheese-related gaffes and an overall feeling of lovelessness had us yawning our way through our porky meal. The slab’s dull vibe was introduced by the merely-there tortilla (ungrilled and even unsteamed, on our watch) and continued on through the harmless spiciness.
It's too bad, but not unexpected, considering the reputation of this particular Mission stalwart and its mother ship, Pancho Villa Taqueria. These are some of the workhorse taquerias in the Mission and we appreciate their role, but they just don't bring in the hard-won raves like a Castillito or a San Francisco, even with a face-lift, it seems.
But the hell on earth that was the January hiatus/siesta of Burritoeater has finally ended.
As of Friday, our favorite burrito review site is back in action, with the publication of the 2007 Slabbies, as well as a visit to the Shotwell Tonayense truck. The Slabbies, as you surely know, constitute the annual Burritoeater best-ofs. We'll republish the top five here, because we know you can't wait even one click for the results. You'd better head over to Burritoeater for complete results as well as that hilarious and insightful Tonayense visit.
Top five burritos of 2007:
1 - Dos Piñas Taq., November 1, 9.17 mustaches
This Potrero Hill stalwart, long known for its spectacular tortilla soup and mediocre, yet costly burritowork, stunned our panel with Burritoeater's highest-rated slab in nearly four years. And to think we ordered a bowl of spectacular tortilla soup as backup for the anticipated mediocre burrito.
2 - Gordo Taq. (Inner Sunset), December 5, 9.08 mustaches
The 2006 Slab Scrum champion added another honor to its expanding list: its first nine-mustache burrito. What’s next? The Gordo Blimp over the Rose Bowl?
3 - Papalote (Western Addition), July 14, 9.08 mustaches
The French didn't have half the fun we had at Papalote on Bastille Day '07.
4 - Taq. El Castillito (Mission), December 31, 9.08 mustaches
2007's top-rated breakfast burrito arrived in the year's dying hours and ensured our panel a lethargic New Year's Eve afternoon.
5 - El Burrito Express (Western Addition), November 20, 8.92 mustaches
By the end of this tour de force, Divisadero's Burrito Train had locked down its first number one ranking on our hullabaloo'd Mustache Chart
This Thread on Chowhound romantically asks the question on the mind of every Bay Arean (really? is that what we are?) who's ever enjoyed San Diego Mexican food: Where can I get a California burrito north of the Grapevine?
California burritos, for those who have lived in this bubble all their burrito-eating lives, are those delicious creations that wrap carne asada, cheese and French fries in a tortilla. There are variations, but the crux is carne asada and fries. Nobody but nobody seems to do them here.
Well, despite many posters missing the point entirely, at least one directs our starry-eyed OP to Adelberto's a San Diego chain with locations in Fairfield and Stockton. Via con amore, radikalbandit!
After reading a story about a Chicago restaurant that makes its customers sign a waiver before ordering its hot wings, we got to thinking about some of San Francisco's hottest tickets.
The first thing that jumped to mind was the orange Habanero salsa at Taqueria Guadalajara on 24th St. The stuff is so hot that one chipful stayed with us for hours, refusing to be tamed by a whole super-nachos' worth of crema.
Also, the folks at the Hot Sauce Blog dilligently review hot sauces, as you might imagine, and provide recipes, tips and information on raw peppers. Apparently Habaneros aren't the hottest in the world, but somehow Guadalajara managed to make them so. We may never drink hot liquids again.
This is not really breaking news or anything, but we thought we'd give it a mention, as nothing has surfaced in Burritoeater or Burritophile, the go-to burrito sites around these parts: A Chicago (yes, Chicago) burrito blogger (and baseball stats geek) has developed what he calls the Burrito Bracket, a system for rating about 20 Chicago taquerias.
Now, you've surely seen Burritoeater's Slab Scrum, which pits eight of San Francisco's finest in a tournament-type competition for mustache ratings. The Burrito Bracket is sort of like that, but way more about the tourney stats and less about the individual subtleties of each restaurant.
But it's hard to say how accurate the Burrito Bracket could possibly be, as we've never been to Chicago and have never tasted what Chicagoans call a "burrito." If it's anything like a New York burrito, one might as well forget the whole thing and order a pizza.
Regardless of how accurate the criticism or how tasty the fare, however, the Burrito Bracket delivers a level of structure to taqueria rankings that far surpasses the wide-ranging Burritophile or hyper-specific Burritoeater. Not that these guys need to change, but it's interesting to compare notes. Surely, a competition like this would come in second only to a Bay Bridge Series in terms of local buzz, but it would be a hell of a lot more work.
Well, after last spring's vigorous online burrito debate on the merits of So-Cal vs. Nor-Cal burritos, peace has reigned for a while. However, some recent cyber-rumblings suggest that, unless careful diplomacy is exercised, we may be headed for BWII.
A thread on Chowhound seeks LA-Style Mexican food, but served on a plate at a margarita restaurant, not a taqueria. Well, we're not exactly sure what the OP wants, as the big north-south cuisine divide is over whether to put rice, beans and veggies in burritos. On a side-note, we're amazed nobody mentioned La Rondalla in the thread. But that's just us.
But another minor confrontation seems to have made its way into Burritoeater's newsleter, the Intestinal Apocalypse:
Dear Beano: Hi, I moved up here to San Francisco from San Diego a few years ago. The burritos there are far superior. For one, they don't put rice or beans in their carne asada burritos. It's just guacamole and salsa or pico de gallo. It's delicious that way. And you get way more meat. They also have the "California Burrito" - these are delicious. They mix sour cream, a little bit of cheese, and fries with carne asada.
Now, we've had California burritos, and they are a phenomenon worthy of great respect. Southern California Mexican food in general is pretty great. But we also know the glories of a Mission burrito all too well, and it's going to be very hard to call a winner between these two.
Here's some of the language that started the first battles, from an interview with San Diego burrito expert Crawford Coates (who, in the interest of full disclosure, is a friend of ours):
...there was an article in the Washington Post three years ago by this guy who owns a burrito shop in D.C. He said he knew a lot about burritos because he's from the "town of the burrito, San Francisco." He said the best burritos are from San Francisco and I've heard that a dozen times. Having lived there, I know that they're really good only if you're drunk, but compared to the San Diego burrito, they're not even close. They're wrapped in foil, steamed and they put beans and rice in everything.
"There are some pretty awesome burritos in San Diego, but it's kind of like the Triple-A baseball of the burrito world. You can get a really good one every now and then, but you'll see consistently more boneheaded assembly errors than you will up here in the big leagues."
Well, the conflict died down but was never really resolved. And after Burritoeater's "Mr. Beano" response to the reader who couldn't get off the CA burrito tip, we wonder if it is "on" once more:
I really hate the burritos up here. I do. So much. Can you recommend any taquerias that have any burritos like I mention?
Dear Apocalypse reader: Sure, but they're all 500 miles down the Pacific coast from your current home. Now, I'm just thinking aloud here, but I wonder how a burrito shop named Taq. San Diego would fare in San Francisco? If Giordano Bros. can do a solid business in North Beach with those Pittsburgh-style, fries-inclusive sandwiches, why not a new taqueria that serves fries-inclusive burritos sans all the usual super burrito embellishment? You could decorate the walls with signed photos from Jameson Parker, Tony Gwynn, Pete Wilson, Three Mile Pilot, even the San Diego Chicken. Here's your challenge: Get your MBA pals on the horn on the double and cobble together a business plan, then find a vacant shopfront here in San Francisco and live the California Burrito Dream. I'll be there on opening day, scorecard in hand, looking menacing and mustachioed and, as usual, stinking of Old Spice.
Shoot, you going to take that, Mr. or Ms. Apocalypse reader?
We generally respect Burritoeater's opinion, so when that venerable connoisseur doled out his highest review in months, we took notice. Last week, Dos Pinas scored a 9.17-mustache rating. Good work, guys! The quality seems to have surprised even Burritoeater himself:
Taquerias with longstanding reputations for undersized, overpriced, shrugtacular burritowork aren’t supposed to weigh in at 9.17 mustaches, completely out of nowhere. What the hell happened here? Our sharp decision to go the super fajita ordering route here resulted in generous dimensions, more melted jack than we (almost) knew what to with, some right tasty guacamole, and a throng of grilled onion and red bell pepper that played a significant role in sealing this extraordinary burrito’s nine-mustache deal. Elsewhere, the steady-rollin’ refried beans contributed tasty squish throughout this slab’s 18-bite stay, while the grilled tortilla and subtly peppered pork each caught and maintained our attention top to bottom. The delicious and moist rice, perfectly applied in both placement and amount, also deserves much credit, as does the spiciness...the kind that sneaks in after about a dozen bites and slyly reminds you it’s been there all along, and it’s only going to escalate.
It's nice the Burritoeater does a taqueria visit pretty much every three days. It keeps things regular in this crazy world of ours. It's especially nice that this time they visited El Faro because we had not yet seen their general write-up of the place, which includes the assertion that that particular taqueria was the BIRTHPLACE OF THE SUPER BURRITO.
Now, San Francisco claims to be the birthplace of a lot of things: Irish coffee, cioppino and hippies, for example, claim roots in this town. But the invention of the super burrito leaves pretty much everything else on earth far behind. To pinpoint that invention not only to a certain taqueria, but to a specific date--Tuesday, September 26, 1961--gives us the kind of satisfaction known only to people like that guy who caught Barry Bonds' record-breaking ball, or the children of the wizard who first combined chocolate with peanut butter. That is to say, total.
