When The House Rules Take Up An Entire Page
We've spent much of the past few days processing new menus, which, as you might imagine, can get a little monotonous. But every once in a while, a menu comes along that makes us laugh. Enter Madrono, a Nicaraguan restaurant on 107th and Flagler which is listed on the site as of this morning. First, the menu is 11 pages long, and one page is devoted to listing the house rules, which appear in both English and Spanish. Because this is the kind of stuff that is generally not included on the online menu, we thought we'd list it here (just the English version) for your enjoyment:
• ID is required in order to process your credit card
• $10 minimum per credit card
• No personal checks accepted
• We do not seat incomplete parties
• No smoking
• No substitutions
• Soliciting is prohibited
• No pets allowed
• We are not responsible for lost or stolen items
• No outside food or drinks allowed
• A gratuity of 15% is automatically added to all checks*
• Only two seperate [sic] checks per table. Please advise your waiter before ordering
• We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone
• Proper attire required
• Alcoholic beverages will only be served with your food
• Cake cutting service $1.00 per person
• Restrooms are only for our customers
• Corkage fee $15.00
They range from the perfectly reasonable ($10 credit card minimum, no soliciting, no personal checks) to the annoying (automatic tip included in the check, cake cutting fee per person). Personally, we think it's a bit of a turnoff to be greeted by such a long set of rules while ordering dinner. Then again, we appreciate the owners' desire to set everyone straight from the beginning, so that there's no confusion when the check comes. We just wonder what kinds of scenarios have made them feel the need to dedicate an entire page of the menu to this long list of rules.
Madrono [MenuPages]
* This rule is in large text and written in English, Spanish and what appears to be Creole.
